Why I Blog

I love to write, but more importantly I love being a light for others when they are surrounded by darkness. When I started this blog, I knew nothing about blogging I just knew I had a message for someone. Blogging is something I look forward to daily, I don’t have a message every day, but I look for messages every day.

Blogging is easy for me, most days I will get a message in my head and I will have it mentally written before I get home. Some days leaving work I will sit in my car and write before heading home. I don’t know who my messages are for but I know they are for someone.

I believe everything I write; I have lived everything I write, and I am truly happy that I can share my experiences with the world. Thank you for allowing me into your life and I pray that you live a life full of blessings and favor.

Detelshia Monet

The Lord is my light and my salvation whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life of whom shall I be afraid? -Psalm 27:11 –

A New Day

Today is a different day. Not the same as yesterday, or the day before. This means it doesn’t have a history yet, it hasn’t been created. Today is a day where you can start doing something that you have always wanted to do. You can forgive someone for what they did to you ten years ago. You can create new habits. You can breathe easily knowing that the troubles of yesterday are no more.

Use this day to create a new day, a day to do something that is going to make your tomorrow better. Monday (last week), I had a hard day, Tuesday I woke up and decided, that day wouldn’t be like yesterday (Monday). I decided to let the feelings subside and move on with what was in front of me. Many times, we have a bad day or a bad experience and we let it linger from day to day to day; never really experiencing a new day because we are still carrying the burdens of yesterday, so it’s really just a different day. I’ve been there, one day you look up and a whole year has gone by and you’re still in a funk about something you can’t even change.

As people we have to get in the habit of letting things go and understanding what will be, will be. We have to get in the habit of unloading some of our baggage. Your kid was disrespectful and acted a complete fool in the store, don’t let that carry over into tomorrow. A customer was rude, let it go. Things didn’t go as planned, oh well, plans change. It is important to not let experiences get in and take residence; learn to move on from them. Learn to experience new days.

Not every experience is going to come with closure, not every experience is going to lead to understanding, not every experience is going to make it easier to forgive, but with each experience you can learn and you can grow from it. Wake up each day with the attitude that today is a new day, what happened yesterday will not control my today.

Wake up knowing that you are blessed, you have been granted new mercies. Wake up knowing that your future is bright and that the only thing that can stop you from reaching you goals is you. Yesterday is out of your control but today, this new day, is yours to master!

  • Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, -Phil 3:13-
  • The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. -Lamentations 3:22-23-

Loving my (gay) son

My son is gay. He has been going through a lot over the past few years and I often questioned why it is so easy for me to love him and others have such a hard time. He has been talked about, made to feel less than, and he has been condemned by people who claim they love him.

I think I have known longer than anyone that he was gay, and I never had a problem accepting him. We have been through many transitions over the years and I have always loved and encouraged him through it. I am a Christian, I do my best to follow God’s word daily, but me being a Christian does not mean I cannot love and accept my son for who he is. He once asked me “if God knew us before He formed us in the womb, why did He make me gay?” He was trying to gain some understanding because people were telling him God would never accept him, yet this is the way he came into the world.

I use to feel the need to defend every negative comment about homosexual people because I felt like they needed someone defending them against people who don’t really understand that this wasn’t necessarily a choice for them. I also felt like I needed to defend my son. This was exhausting, I soon realized that I couldn’t defend everyone, I could only be there to encourage, support, and guide my son. My son always has and will always have a safe place when it comes to me.

When he has questions, I do my best to answer them. When he is confused, I do my best to make things clear.  When he wants to vent, I listen. When he cries, I console and encourage. When he wants to learn the new Beyoncé dance, I am there right beside him. When he feels alone, I am his friend. I cherish these moments. Not just with him but with all my children. They know if they don’t have anyone else in this world, they have their mom.

On Friday, I was on my way home and it was one of those moments where I just need some peace and quiet to clear my mental space. I asked the question again; “why is it so easy for me to love my gay son” and the answer I got cleared everything up. It is easy for me because I loved him before I knew he was gay. I’ll say that again; I loved him before I knew he was gay. Nothing about my son changed when he told me he was gay, he was and is the same child I gave birth to, the same child I raised, the same child that loved me when I wasn’t “perfect.” Nothing changed about my child.

Many people focus on the fact that they are gay, that it is a sin, the lifestyle is not accepting, it isn’t normal. Well that wasn’t for me to decide, my decision was to love, support, and cherish my son. I often tell people that when I get to the gates of heaven I will not have to answer for my son being gay, I will have to answer for how I treated my son.

My son has struggled with his Christian beliefs for a while now because of what people tell him about the bible and how God feels about him. I encourage him to read, get to know the bible and God for himself. Even in his disbelief I prayed for him and made sure to keep him in church. At a young age my son has experienced God and His love, and he now believes again. Some people live life lost because they have no one standing in the gap for them. I was not having this for my child. I prayed for him constantly, I talked to him, and when I felt him getting off track I asked God for guidance. Before I give my son any sound advice I pray first, because I know one wrong word and I become like everyone else who has torn him down.

In closing, what I really want everyone reading this to get out of this message is that nothing that we do can separate us from the love of God (Romans 38-39) and there is nothing my children can do that can make me stop loving them. They grow, they change, they make mistakes, but they know I will always be there with open arms. The bible tells us we should love our neighbors, like we love ourselves. It doesn’t distinguish between race, gender, age, spiritual beliefs, or sexual orientation; it clearly states love your neighbors. Loving my son is easy because I loved him before he ever knew what being gay meant.

As always, thank you for reading. Please feel free to leave a comment or contact me through the contact card, found in the drop-down menu.   

Fear or Faith?

Detelshia Monet

Standing in the doorway she looked out at what was in front of her and then she looked back at what was behind her. In front of her she saw new beginnings, healing, growth, beauty, new relationships, and happiness; most of all she saw the unknown. Behind her she saw the hurt, the failure, the broken relationships, the lack, and the abuse; most of all she saw familiarity. What should she do, she wondered as she stood glancing back and forward between the unknown and the familiarity. One step forward and she walks into her destiny. One step backwards and she walks into her death. Fear crippled her while faith tugged at her. Fear was telling her she couldn’t and her faith was telling her to trust God. She knew she had to let one go but which one would it be?

This is what it feels like when you…

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Take the Limits Off

When your sight is limited, so is your vision. Your vision will only go as far as you can see, as far as the situation you are in right now. When your vision is limited, so is your blessings. We are only blessed with those things that we believe are possible, if we are only depending on what we see, our beliefs are limited.

Your vision is the belief in something greater, something you can’t see in the physical sense. One definition for vision is the ability to think about or plan the future with imagination or wisdom. When you only focus on things in front of you, you can’t have a vision for anything else. Sometimes our mountains are so big we can’t see around them so we get stuck believing that this is where we are supposed to be. You cannot see around so you can’t see what’s on the other side.

After every trail, tribulation, test, or setback there is always something on the other side. You have to expand your sight so that your vision can get bigger. Look past your current situation and see all the possibilities of tomorrow. Tonight, I am tired but tomorrow will be better. My debt is surmounting but I know if I keep managing what I have one day I will have more than enough. This house isn’t big enough for my family but one day soon we’ll have more than enough room. Tonight, I sit in this room alone but I know one day this room will be filled with love.

When you start speaking these words of faith, expanding your vision beyond your current situation you will start to see a change. The mountain will begin to crumble right in front of your face. In Habakkuk 2:2 it says write the vision and make it plain, so he may run who reads it. This means write out what you want your future to look like, what do you see? Do not complicate it with big words or long plans. Once it is written read it and then get to work. Start working toward those things you see in your future. You cannot pray for a husband and have a vision of your marriage and sit in your living room every day. It just doesn’t work like that.

God knows the plans he has for us; we just have to believe that all things are possible. Yes, all things. What are you facing today that you cannot see past? What is stopping you from getting the vision, from believing? Before I go, I want to leave you with one message; it will cost you nothing to believe but it will cost you everything if you don’t believe.

I hope you enjoyed reading this post just a much as I enjoyed writing it. If you care to share your thoughts please leave a comment in the section below.